The "Unstuck" Toolkit: 3 Reflection Tools to Reset, Realign, and Move Forward

There's this feeling I bet you know well. It's like being underwater but still trying to breathe normally. Everything feels harder than it should be. Your motivation has gone missing, probably somewhere between Monday's endless meetings and realising you can't remember the last time you did something just because you wanted to.

Maybe you're in a season of burnout, and everything feels like you're moving through thick honey. Maybe you've been so focused on everyone else's needs that you've lost track of your own. Or maybe life just feels... off. Like you're living someone else's version of what your days should look like.

Here's what I've learned from my own stuck seasons and from talking to people navigating everything from career transitions to family chaos: you don't need to have it all figured out to start moving again. You just need a reset. A moment to pause, get honest about where you are, and remember what actually matters to you.

That's where the Unstuck Toolkit comes in. These aren't complex systems or lengthy processes—they're three simple tools you can use right now to reset, realign, and take one step forward. Today.

Tool #1: The Life Audit Wheel (Your 4-Pillar Reality Check)

Sometimes we feel stuck because life is completely out of whack, but we're too close to see it. It's like trying to figure out why your car is wobbling while you're driving 70 mph down the highway. You need to pull over and look at the whole picture.

The Life Audit Wheel helps you do exactly that. It's a simple way to get a snapshot of your current life across four key areas:

Inner Compass – This is your internal world. How clear are you on what you want? Do you trust yourself? What's your mental state like day to day?

Vital Energy – Your physical foundation. How's your sleep? Are you moving your body in ways that feel good? What are you feeding yourself (literally and metaphorically)?

Creative Contribution – This is about your work in the world, but not just your job. It's your sense of purpose, the ways you create and contribute, whether that's through your career, parenting, art, or how you show up in your community.

Connected Belonging – Your relationships and support systems. Do you feel seen and understood? Are you giving and receiving support? Do you have your people?

Here's how to do it:

• Draw a circle on a piece of paper and divide it into four sections, one for each pillar

• For each area, give yourself a score from 0 to 10 (10 means you're absolutely thriving, 0 means this area feels completely off the rails)

• Shade in each section according to your score

What you'll end up with is a visual "wheel" of your life right now. Is it round and balanced, or does it look like it would give you the world's worst ride? Are there areas that are completely flat? Where is your energy being drained? Where is it flowing?

This isn't about judging yourself or feeling bad about the flat spots. It's about getting clear on what needs attention so you can choose where to focus next. Sometimes just seeing it on paper is enough to make you go, "Oh. That's why everything feels so hard right now."

Tool #2: The Values Reality Check

We feel most stuck when we're living out of alignment with what actually matters to us. The tricky part? A lot of what we think matters to us isn't even really ours. It's what we've absorbed from family, society, social media, or that voice in our head that sounds suspiciously like our high school guidance counsellor.

This exercise helps you figure out the difference between your real values and the ones you might have inherited or been talked into.

Start by making a list of values you think you live by. Things like success, family, freedom, security, creativity, service, adventure—whatever comes to mind.

Now comes the interesting part. For each value on your list, ask yourself:

• Is this actually mine, or did I pick it up from someone else?

• When I live according to this value, do I feel energised or drained?

• What would be more true for me right now?

You might discover some surprising things. Maybe you've been prioritising achievement when what you really crave is peace. Maybe you've been trying to be the person who has it all together when what you actually value is authenticity and being real about the messy parts.

I once realised I had "productivity" on my values list, but every time I tried to optimise my life for maximum output, I felt terrible. What I actually valued was creativity and spaciousness, which require a completely different approach to how I structure my days.

Once you're clear on what's really yours, you can start making decisions that feel like you again instead of trying to live up to some external idea of who you should be.

Tool #3: Three Questions That Change Everything

Sometimes the most powerful reset happens when you ask yourself the right questions and get brave enough to answer them honestly. These three prompts can shift your entire internal landscape when you're feeling stuck:

• What feels heavy right now?

• What would feel lighter?

• Where am I avoiding truth?

Set a timer for 10-15 minutes, pick the question that hits you in the gut, and just write. Don't worry about making it pretty or coherent. Don't edit yourself. Just get it out.

The first question helps you identify what you've been carrying that maybe isn't yours to carry. The second one points you toward what your system actually needs. The third one... well, that's where the real gold is. It's where you get honest about the things you've been pretending not to know.

Maybe you'll realise you've been avoiding the truth that your current lifestyle is slowly killing your soul. Or that you're exhausted because you keep saying yes when you mean no. Or that you've been waiting for someone else to give you permission to want what you want.

These questions are designed to surface what's been hanging out just under the surface—the quiet truths, the uncomfortable awarenesses, the things your intuition has been trying to tell you but you've been too busy to listen.

The Real Deal About Getting Unstuck

Here's what I want you to know: getting unstuck doesn't usually happen with one dramatic leap or a complete life makeover. It happens in moments like this. When you pause long enough to check in with yourself. When you get honest about what's working and what isn't. When you choose one small thing that feels more aligned with who you're becoming.

This toolkit isn't about fixing yourself because you're not broken. It's about meeting yourself exactly where you are right now—with curiosity instead of judgment, with compassion instead of criticism.

So take a breath. Find a pen. Choose whichever tool called to you while you were reading this, and start there.

You don't need to see the whole path. You just need to take the next step that feels true. And then the next one. That's how anyone finds their way forward—one honest step at a time.

The unstuck life you're looking for isn't out there somewhere. It's in these small moments of choosing yourself, again and again, until those choices become the foundation of a life that actually feels like yours.